One of "THOSE Parents"

As I mentioned in the post a few below this one, Malía was exhibiting some behaviours that I thought could mean she was unhappy in school.  Then, last week when a nasty boy child that Mal often mentioned as rough to kids,  punched her in the stomach (and it was bad enough that another child went home and told her own parents), I did it. I called her teacher.  I am now offcially "one of those parents".

And, I am glad I did b/c even though it doesn't "fix" anything I:

a) now know why she leaves 3/4's of her food for the day untouched.  Apparently, they have 15 minutes for snack times and 20 minutes for lunch. If they run over by too much, they are told to pack up and head out for recess.  Malia was telling me "But, the teacher says I can't eat it and makes me go outside."  I now, at least, know what that means.
And, that doesn't mean I like it.  I mean, I know kids can't spend forever eating their food (and with Mal, I guess part of that precious wolf your lunch/snack and run time is spent CHOOSING what to have first, second etc), but seriously, this smacks of eating disorders waiting to happen, you know?
So, tonight, when I packed I did so very ecomomically, leaving no choice really-  she has fresh fruit for morning snack, 1/2 a tuna sandwich and a pickle for lunch and a organic brownie cookie for afternoon snack. She's also taking a juice, and will get milk at school.  And, hopefully, I will find an empty lunch box when she comes home tomorrow night, especially since I put a note in her bag asking them to ensure she can eat it!

b) am glad the teacher knows about the little schoolyard bully and will keep an eye on him.  She said she had never seen anything, but the kid hasn't been stupid enough to do the damage in front of the teacher-  he waits until recess.  When my dad picked up Mal on friday, she ratted the kid out to him. The kid's Mama heard and tried to make the kid apologize, but he ignored her and walked ahead.  Hmmm-  if he ever touches MY kid again, I may have to whoop some little 4 year old hiney, myself!

c) now know that she isn;t just scribbling. The teacher says that she does write her name, draw properly etc at school, and that the teacher makes a huge deal about it b/c most can't and Mal is one of the youngest. That made me cringe a little and may explain why Malia suddenly tries to get away with pronouncing "here" as "he-oh" and babyfying other such words. When I say, Malia you know better, stop it, she comes back with the fact that most of the others say "he-oh"-  I think she just wants to blend, not be centered out.

Now, I also learned something that doesn't come as news b/c she oh so does it at home, too, but still sent a kind of sharp arrow into Mama's heart-   Malía doesn't listen well.    And, she's gotten a few time outs as a result. I guess engaging ther person next to her happens at inoportune times, and at times, she doesn't follow the teacher's directives.  That last one almost made me laugh b/c if Mal finds something useless or illogical, she'll either tune out the speaker, or do the opposite, and it's irritating as hell, I admit, but also wholly logical.
So, this weekend, we have been really drilling the listening. I want her teacher to see her as I do-  beautiful, gifted, funny, sensitive and kid, not as a little poop disturber.  I know too well what happens to kids who are labelled such, you know?

When Malia's communication book came home after the parent-teacher pow wow, it said not to hesitate to let her know if I had any other concerns.  Oh, honey, don't worry-  I've got your number right here:)