Malía will turn 27 months in 3 days. What will the world, in terms of racism, be when she is 7 years old, 27 years old? Right now, though I do see she is drawn to people of colour, she has yet to make a distinction aloud. She's also very light skinned and I am a "pink" olive tan, so there's not a huge difference btwn us- maybe she truly hasn't noticed. Who knows?
But, I do know that as a single mom, as a mom of a "brown" child, as a mom of an adopted child, I will likely have questions to answer, and tears to dry of a slightly different kind than other parents encounter.
I found THIS article in O magazine interesting. And, just the fact that it's in there shows how mainstream Single motherhood, and Ethiopian adoptions have become. Now, if the world can just look at it as a totally mainstream way to be a family, all will be well.
But, I do know that as a single mom, as a mom of a "brown" child, as a mom of an adopted child, I will likely have questions to answer, and tears to dry of a slightly different kind than other parents encounter.
I found THIS article in O magazine interesting. And, just the fact that it's in there shows how mainstream Single motherhood, and Ethiopian adoptions have become. Now, if the world can just look at it as a totally mainstream way to be a family, all will be well.
10 comments:
Great article. I have no doubt you will support your daughter's confidence in herself and champion her all the way. I hope the tears are few and far between.
You will no doubt have questions to answer- but all parents do. It is great you are thinking about them now.
My son did not ask a lot of questions about where he came from until a school assignment in 6th grade- we had to do a family tree.
I adopted a Hispanic Foster Child as a teen- so we had always spoken freeley in our home about the differences- and honestly it has never been a big deal because we did not make it a big deal. Malia and litta sista will learn they have a great Mom with a big heart who loves them enough to teach them what a great worl this is to live in- and getting better every day!
You have read my mind. The last few days I have the some questions in my mind. Although Kayla is 25% black, 25% white and 50% hispanic, I wonder what she will think of the difference in color between her and I and Nick, or if she will at all. I wonder if other kids will question her about her family. I wonder how that will effect her.
P.S. Im soooo LOVING that baby picture of her in your header. That is great!
Great article, thanks for sharing. With Adea starting school in 2 Septembers it is something I am thinking about alot. Adea does notice the difference in our colours...it has come out when we are playing little peek a boo type games...she will say Mama's pink nose or hands and refer to her nose as brown. Interestly when she sees a brown adult she says nothing to indicate she has noticed colour and is no more drawn to them than pink adults. But when we've run into brown kids her age she would say, "it's Adea", the last time she said looks like Adea. However, at the Ethio get together with all the little brown kids running around she said nothing. At this point I am hoping to be able to move to a town about 20 minutes from where we live now. There are still not alot of brown kids there but my guess would be 10 to 15% of the school population is asian or indian. If we stay where we are now she would go to the school I teach at where we have 3 children who are brown, the rest are caucaisin. Right now she is a confident, strong willed little girl who is proud of who she is..I just hope we can keep that in tact through those elementary school years.
I do think any adoptive parent is going to have to answer questions that are sensitive. Appearance is right in your face so to speak so it is noticed sooner. I also think a big topic is going to be where is "Daddy?". Cory hasn't noticed our differences yet that I can tell but within the last week he as started calling for "Da Da". I think this has alot to do with his new class. There is a Daddy that does the drop off instead of a mommy.
Malia is delicious sitting on Khobi---love it!!
Yeah--we have some odds againest us as parents, but education, awareness, sensitivity to our children first....that's what'll help dry the tears.
And thankfully, we have strong role models of colour, as opposed to years ago--when they still existed but weren't spoken about.
P.S. Could your heading photo be any MORE delicious??? Where is that baby???
HSM#3= High School Musical #3
Great article!!! Olivia LOves Obama!!
It's so very cool to be living in this time, when our children will live to see great change!!
Figs just noticed this week. She just very matter of factly stated that she was brown and I was pink and then started chattering about something else. I wish the world were matter of fact instead of matter of fiction...
That's an excellent article. What ever difference in skin color, you will always be Mal's momma and a wonderful one!!! ;o)
Love the pic of Mal sitting on the beast! :o) The header picture is simply precious!!!
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